Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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