Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Barsexuality is the new black.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
I think i got beer on your cat.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
