This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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