Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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