Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
Randomize
