I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
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