And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
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