That's when you crack a 10am beer
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Randomize