dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
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