Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
Randomize
