May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
