Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
Randomize
