two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
