Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
Please don't give away my fajitas
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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