i don't plan on having that self control this summer
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
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