I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
Quick, to the slutcave!
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
