I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
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