Hello Stephanie, you need to come pick me up at Par Blvrd correctional facility and bring $750-$1000 for bail. I just got a DUI. Thank you.
What!?!?! How are you txting?!
Because this is Officer Reynolds, and I just arrested your boyfriend.
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize