peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Randomize