im so drunk with asians
where?
always
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize