Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
