Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
