Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
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