So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
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