Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
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