You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
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