Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(678): View more from Georgia

part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic

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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse

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(281): View more from Texas

Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.

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(905): View more from Ontario

No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf

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(405): View more from Oklahoma

Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring

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(415): View more from California

Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends

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(519): View more from Ontario

Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"

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(650): View more from California

i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD

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