Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
Randomize
