I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Randomize
