well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
She's just so happy...and so naked.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
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