She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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