my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
