you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
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