Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
the day after is always just damage control
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Randomize
