You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Randomize
