R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Boobs are out for the taking
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize
