Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
They have beer where we have blood.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Randomize