I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
