God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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