So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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