JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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