you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
Randomize
