I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Randomize
