how hairy? two words: wookie tits
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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