if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
Randomize
