She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Randomize