imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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