i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
You have to summon your inner elephant
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
Randomize
