Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
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