There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
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